Sheryl Crow calls for bog roll restrictions

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 24 Apr 2007, 15:33

Lionel Blair was on Give Us A Clue.

Porty · Post by **Porty** » 24 Apr 2007, 15:35

So was Una Stubbs who used to be sitcom married to Cherie Blairs' brother.

teddygirl · Post by **teddygirl** » 24 Apr 2007, 15:57

Geoffrey Durham used to appear on Coutdown quite a lot.

ecm · Post by **ecm** » 24 Apr 2007, 16:37

Porty wrote:So was Una Stubbs who used to be sitcom married to Cherie Blairs' brother.

It was Cherie's Dad, rather than brother, I think and he was quite dishy in the days of Til Death etc. in a spammy Sixties kind of way.

Porty · Post by **Porty** » 24 Apr 2007, 18:47

I wouldn't wipe my a rse with Sheryl Crow.

Mainly because she'd get so upset at how much paper it takes.

mr magnolia · Post by **mr magnolia** » 25 Apr 2007, 23:35

ecm wrote:
I hate Sheryl Crow for lots of reasons,

I want to know what makes you want to give her the bum's rush?

Do tell.

Epykat · Post by **Epykat** » 26 Apr 2007, 12:32

A woman asks her husband to buy her a boob job for her birthday. He says "Just get a bit toilet paper and rub it up and down between your boobs". She says "What's that going to do?". He replies "Well, it worked for your bum!"

Sorry

kipling · Post by **kipling** » 26 Apr 2007, 13:03

How about Every Bidet is a Winding Road?

Or Run, Baby, Run (for these tricky three-sheet visits, obviously).

Black Mamba · Post by **Black Mamba** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:05

You delivered those so dead pan...........

Nelson Hatstand · Post by **Nelson Hatstand** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:14

Here at Camp Hatstand we're currently trialling a new system where no bog roll is required at all.

Suck on that, Crow, you talentless old goat.

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:20

Please tell me you eat with the other hand.

Nelson Hatstand · Post by **Nelson Hatstand** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:24

Hands remain clean. No direct contact with faeces.

Maria · Post by **Maria** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:49

Please tell me you don't use hamsters

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 26 Apr 2007, 16:57

Your neighbour's curtains?

rapunzell · Post by **rapunzell** » 26 Apr 2007, 17:28

The roundabout rabbits!

bearcub · Post by **bearcub** » 26 Apr 2007, 19:47

'Bog Roll calls for Sheryl Crow restrictions'

"We just can't deal with any more of her sh*te" laments the Andrex puppy.

foxy · Post by **foxy** » 26 Apr 2007, 20:08

Nelson Hatstand wrote:Here at Camp Hatstand we're currently trialling a new system where no bog roll is required at all.

Suck on that, Crow, you talentless old goat.

...Immodium?

Epykat · Post by **Epykat** » 26 Apr 2007, 21:18

Re-usable colostomy bag?

Black Mamba · Post by **Black Mamba** » 26 Apr 2007, 22:19

the garden hose?

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 26 Apr 2007, 22:44

Maria · Post by **Maria** » 27 Apr 2007, 13:57

Nelson Hatstand wrote:Here at Camp Hatstand we're currently trialling a new system where no bog roll is required at all.

Suck on that, Crow, you talentless old goat.

Election leaflets?

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 27 Apr 2007, 14:36

I wouldn't wipe my bum with a Conservative party election leaflet.

Pal of Porty · Post by **Pal of Porty** » 27 Apr 2007, 15:43

Dadaist wrote:I wouldn't wipe my bum with a Conservative party election leaflet.

Oh I don't know.....is that not what they are printed for?

SoupDragon · Post by **SoupDragon** » 27 Apr 2007, 16:10

Pal of Porty wrote:
Dadaist wrote:I wouldn't wipe my bum with a Conservative party election leaflet.
Oh I don't know.....is that not what they are printed for?

So true. They even come with instructions where to put your 1 and 2s

Nelson that wasn't your family I saw cavorting in the Forth yesterday evening wasit?

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 12 May 2007, 17:15

So now, La Crow has adopted a sprog :

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/6649933.stm

Poor wee mite will grow up in a regime of toilet roll terror.

Admittedly multi-million dollar terror, but this poses the philosophical poser of whether one would prefer sheet restrictions whilst having a Crow-sized wad, or the ability to use wads of the wiping stuff but not have rock star millions.

Hmm.

ecm · Post by **ecm** » 12 May 2007, 19:09

Dadaist wrote:So now, La Crow has adopted a sprog

Let's see how different a tune Ms. Crow now caws when faced with the outpourings from new sprog.

On a positive note,hopefully this motherhood malarkey will keep her out of recording studios for the next few years.

Dadaist · Post by **Dadaist** » 12 Aug 2007, 23:22

Every day is a winding roll.

Porty · Post by **Porty** » 13 Aug 2007, 00:30

Unwinding surely?

rathbone · Post by **rathbone** » 13 Aug 2007, 13:28

Dadaist wrote:Every day is a winding roll.

or, in my case, a rolling wind.